Have you ever heard yourself say, “I’m a nice person. I’m a polite person. I’d never intentionally do anything to hurt anybody. So why don’t other people give me the respect I deserve?” The problem could well be due to a difficulty with assertion. Maybe you aren’t showing your nice, polite, and respectful qualities to other people. Unless they can see who you truly are, underneath it all, other people might not know how you expect to be treated. And this can lead to some unhappy experiences.
Active Communication Requires One Person to Talk and the Other to Listen … and Both to Do Their Parts Well
Listening is the other half of communication. Our first thought, when we think about communication, may be to consider the speaker’s ability to convey ideas effectively. What we often forget is that without a listener the speaker may as well be talking to the wind. Just as effective speaking is an acquired skill, so is good listening. Some do it better than others. But all of us can learn to enrich our own listening skills.
“If I Win, You Lose” is Not Our Only Option!
Control, like most facets of human behavior, is probably best experienced in moderation. At one end of the spectrum, control is a positive, adaptive tool. For example, control over prolonged and constant chaos in our lives is usually a good thing. At the other end, control can be seen as negative. People who are over-controlled to the point of being unable to feel or express emotion can find life’s expected turmoils to be difficult or even impossible to handle.
When you think about compatibility, what comes to mind?
Obviously having similar interests is important, such as what you like to do for fun. Another aspect often is having similar life goals and whether or not you are both on the same journey together.
However, did you ever consider how intellectual incompatibility could affect your relationship?
It’s not simply a stand-alone issue. In fact, intellectual incompatibility can influence other areas of relationship compatibility.
If you are finding yourself struggling with your relationship, it may be that you need to consider whether you and your partner are intellectually compatible.
It’s not uncommon to fall out of love with someone.
Even though you have been close for a long time, you may feel that now is the time to end the relationship.
The question then becomes, what’s the best way to go about it?
Even if you feel that you’re no longer in love, you probably still care for your partner to a degree, and you want to break up on as best of terms as possible.
Here are some tips on how you can end your love relationship with grace, dignity, and compassion.
Have you felt like you and your partner are more like roommates than intimate companions? Watching Netflix in your sweatpants while your partner plays a game on their cell phone sounds like a hot date, right?
There is not a lot about that scenario radiating romance. What it does portray is a mutual level of extreme comfort you and your partner have embraced.
Of course, nothing is wrong with feeling comfortable around your partner. Actually, you want to be comfortable with each other. But you also want to nurture the intimate connection you have and acting like roommates simply doesn’t do that.
If you feel stuck in the ‘roommate rut’, try these suggestions:
Love is war. So the saying goes goes .
That comparison may actually be fitting in connection with something you perhaps haven’t thought of—trauma.
It’s no secret that sexual infidelity can be physically harmful and emotionally crushing. A betrayed partner may feel a whole range of devastating emotions and experiences a bewildering variety of bodily symptoms.
One moment they feel angry and irritated, the next as if living in a daze where nothing matters. They can’t sleep, they can’t eat. It’s as if they’ve gone crazy.
It’s a reaction to the trauma of betrayal.
When a relationship is rocked by an affair, the betrayed partner is often the focus of attention. This is normal, since the hurt partner is traumatized.
In the immediate aftermath of the affair, addressing this partner’s anger, pain, shock and confusion is of paramount importance.
But if you have children they also feel the effects and need as much help coping with the painful situation as much as – or even more – than your partner needs.
So after your children learn about your affair, what can you do?
Note: The worst possible scenario you could face would be that your child becomes suicidal. At the end of this article are the Warning Signs of Childhood Depression including what actions you would need to take.
All couples argue. This is normal and an expected part of close relationships. How we conduct ourselves and how we respond to our partner can either enhance the relationship or put it at risk. Consider these guidelines for having constructive arguments with your partner:
After a divorce, you are faced with an unknown frontier. A shared future, once planned and full of possibilities for discovery and passion, is forever changed.
Perhaps your journey now feels scary and uncertain. You’re standing at the starting line again. Alone.
Do you feel as though you’ve lost a big piece of yourself or who you thought you were?
It is that feeling that makes self-care after a divorce so crucial for your mental and emotional healing.