When we commit ourselves to a relationship with another person, we rightly expect to experience a sense of fulfillment that we didn’t have before. Humans, as social beings, seem to have a universal desire to find a partner. Sexual attraction often serves as the motivator for making initial contact with the other person, and this is usually replaced over time with a deeper sense of commitment and intimacy.
It comes as a terrible disappointment to some people when the sexual phase of their relationship fails to lead in time to something deeper. The task, then, is to understand the forces which block the development of a deeper sense of intimacy – and to do something about it. Fortunately, with some work – and it’s often hard work – couples can learn to move into the stage of deeper sharing and more fulfillment in their relationships.
Numerous researchers have examined the phenomenon of being in love. This refers to the stage of feeling whole and complete once we have found someone who matches the image we carry around with us of the person we have been searching for – that is, someone who has the positive and negative qualities of an imperfect parent from our childhood.
The experience of falling in love is one of life’s joys. It brings feelings of delight, passion, connection and hope for a happy future. It can lead to a lifetime of loving contentment. For some people, the “high” that comes from this experience is so compelling that they use it to fill the gaps in their lives, much as they might use a drug. Being in love, for them, can resemble an addiction and dealing with this effectively usually requires help form a professional therapist.
Symptoms of Relationship Addiction:
A new relationship has many emotional and psychological aspects that in some ways can be compared to the birth of a new baby. For example, before a baby is born it is usually safe inside the mother’s womb and it depends only on the immediate environment for everything it needs. In a similar way, just before you meet each other, you and your new partner will probably be safe and secure, relying mostly on yourselves and your immediate environments to supply your needs.