A new relationship has many emotional and psychological aspects that in some ways can be compared to the birth of a new baby. For example, before a baby is born it is usually safe inside the mother’s womb and it depends only on the immediate environment for everything it needs. In a similar way, just before you meet each other, you and your new partner will probably be safe and secure, relying mostly on yourselves and your immediate environments to supply your needs.
If you have relapsed back into an old self-defeating behavior, there are two things you need to remember. First, whatever you accomplished in terms of lifestyle changes before you relapsed are still an important part of your future success. Second, your relapse is also a part of your success. You do not have to start all over again. You have already made gains which are still valuable but you do need to make changes in order to continue succeeding.
When you want to improve your life, part of your psychology can work against you. In other words, you can have a resistance to change. This is normal. Resistance can originate in childhood and grow stronger over a lifetime. Most of us have several ways of resisting change.
Generally, resistance and self-improvement go together. Often showing up during self-improvement work as unexpected thoughts or feelings, resistance doesn’t mean you won’t or can’t change, but it can slow you down or stop you. Here is one form that resistance to self-improvement commonly takes:
