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	<title>Better Relationships &#187; THERAPY</title>
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	<link>https://www.better-relationships.com</link>
	<description>Marriage &#38; Couples Counseling, Psychotherapy, Premarital Counseling</description>
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		<title>After You Cheated &#8211; (4) Keys to Coping with Your Partner&#8217;s Rage</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/after-you-cheated-4-keys-to-coping-with-your-partners-rage/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/after-you-cheated-4-keys-to-coping-with-your-partners-rage/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 20 Sep 2021 00:58:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[FORGIVENESS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[INFIDELITY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[affair recovery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional affairs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[forgiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infidelity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sexual affairs]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4195</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You knew this was going to be hard. After all, when you cheat on the person you love, there is going to be consequences. And this would involve more than a simple argument or disagreement. Your actions have damaged the core of your relationship. What your partner thought was stable, and perhaps even flourishing, actually had an unstable inner core that led to betrayal. That’s exactly how your partner is going to feel—betrayed—aside from a host of other emotions. When they finally get to know the truth, they are going to be angry. And you can’t blame them. No matter how uncomfortable the situation may get, it’s important for you to know how to adequately cope with that anger so that both of you can move forward. Consider these (4) keys to help you deal with their rage. Key #1: Expect the Worst to Happen Before even going into the discussion, take a moment to step back and think. Imagine what your partner will be feeling and experiencing when they find out you cheated. Those emotions may include: Anger Disgust Sadness Fear Confusion Try to visualize how the conversation will occur, what their reaction will be, and how you will respond. Also consider in which way you want to tell them and how you will express it. Having a plan established will give you something to work with and not leave you floundering when things get tense. Key #2: Accept That They Have a Right to Their Emotions When your partner rages at you because you cheated, it can seem really startling. This is especially true if you are not used to them being angry. It might be tempting for you to try to calm them down or even say that they are being “ridiculous.” That, however, would be a mistake. Keep in mind that when someone discovers that their partner has cheated its shocking news. The person whom they thought they could trust is no longer trustworthy at all. This means that all the emotions that they are experiencing rise to the surface at once. It’s a lot to handle, [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>An Awareness of Time</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/an-awareness-of-time/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/an-awareness-of-time/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 23 Aug 2021 23:30:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[DEPRESSION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[depression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[time]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[time management]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[time of your life]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[workaholic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[worry]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4421</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Give Yourself the Time of Your Life When we get right down to it, we must draw one inescapable conclusion: time is our most important asset. And like most assets, there never seems to be enough of it. There are always so many things to do, so many pressures, so many things to keep track of. Our lives seem to whiz by, and where has our time gone? If time is our most important asset, why do we know so little about it?  Why do we stay so busy yet accomplish so little? Are our accomplishments all that important in the overall scheme of our lives? In a sense, when we simplify our lives and become aware of the rhythms of life that occur internally, we can cultivate our sense of time – and we gain self-knowledge that generally escapes us within the bustle of our daily lives.  Think what modern-day life encourages us to do. We need to keep up with the news, drive to work, perform meritoriously on the job, work overtime, maintain a spiritual life, have many friends and a few deeper relationships, be a good partner and perhaps a good parent, keep up with TV and movies and books and music and all the new ideas, travel, have several hobbies, dress in the right fashions, spent time on the Internet, keep good credit, be a good neighbor and participant in the community, do volunteer work, take classes, exercise, and so it goes. It is little wonder that many of us feel so pressured. In the end, what really matters is how well we have lived, not necessarily how much we have done. Like all things natural, our bodies have internal rhythms. There are times during the day, or even the month, or the year, when we do things well, quickly, and easily. We have spurts of energy when we are at our best. And there are other times when our bodies cry out for rest, for down time. To try to be at your most productive during this part of the cycle is futile, and it [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Worry, Worry</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/worry-worry/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/worry-worry/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 15 Sep 2020 22:24:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ADDICTIONS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[ARGUMENTS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Career]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMITMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[DEPRESSION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[how to manage worry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[OCD]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[PTSD]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Stress]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[worry]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4394</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The Serenity Prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. It’s a good thing that almost all of us worry. Think of worry as a built-in alarm device. When it is used wisely, it alerts us to danger and prompts us to navigate our way through a maze of solutions to life’s various problems. We need to think through our options when we are faced with problems, weighing the benefits and pitfalls of each alternative, and then come up with the best solution. From there we take action which, we hope, solves the problem. Worry is helpful when it is used at the right time and at the right level for resolving our difficulties. Like many things in life, however, too little worry, or too much of it, can be harmful. Too Little Too little worry can result in impulsive decisions which may result in unfortunate consequences. Indeed, some people are high risk-takers who may not worry enough about problems – they may win, but just as often, they lose. Others avoid worry through substance abuse or other addictive behaviors and then lack the motivation and insight to deal realistically with life’s expected problems. Similarly, a laid-back, come-what-may approach, while it has some merits, sometimes suggests passivity and a lack of ability to participate in the complexities of life&#8217;s experiences. Too Much As we all know, some people worry too much. Rather than solving a problem, too much worry becomes the problem. Not only does excessive worry create personal suffering, but it also affects the people around the worrier. Worry is a fairly common, but potentially serious, condition. The stress which accompanies worry can have serious physical implications, including an increased risk for blood pressure, heart ailments and immune system deficiencies. Worrying About Things We Can’t Control Most people who worry excessively are well aware of their tendencies, although some simply view it as their normal state of affairs. (Indeed, some people like to worry because they feel that their mind [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Resilient Personality – Coping with Chaos and Hardship</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/the-resilient-personality-coping-with-chaos-and-hardship/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/the-resilient-personality-coping-with-chaos-and-hardship/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Mar 2020 18:35:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Crisis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[DEPRESSION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Divorce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[GRIEF & LOSS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[INFIDELITY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[chaos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grief and loss]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[hardship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infidelity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[job loss]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[resilience]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[trauma]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4367</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”                                                                                                – Ralph Waldo Emerson All of us experience major disruptions at certain points in our lives. In fact, this is an expected and predictable hallmark of the human condition. For some, these hard times come frequently – the impact of the trauma is overwhelming and recovery, if it comes at all, can be painfully slow. Others show resilience and are able to glide through these times fairly easily, bouncing back to a normal life again quickly. Resilience – the strength required to adapt to chaos and hardship – lies at the heart of mental and emotional health. Those who have been emotionally, sexually, and physically abused as children, as well as those who have grown up with learning disabilities and attention deficit disorders share  many of the common characteristics of those who have endured traumas later in life, such as war, the loss of a loved one, natural disasters, financial catastrophes, or a major illness. Normal Life Disruption vs. Trauma What has been most interesting in these studies is the finding that some traumatized people – both those with childhood abuse and other challenges, as well as those who experienced life disruptions in adulthood – suffer virtually no ill effects from the trauma. In fact, in many cases they seem to have grown stronger and led more integrated lives. This unexpected finding has guided researchers to explore the nature of resilience. The normal life cycle contains predictable periods of life disruption. For example, when we move from childhood to adolescence, everything we knew about the world goes through a jarring transformation. During this period of life disorganization, our bodies go through tremendous hormonal and developmental changes, our definitions of other people change, our motives and interests change, we learn how to define ourselves as individuals with autonomy, and we expand our range of social relationships. Similar stages of disruption occur when the adolescent moves into young adulthood, and then into a permanent relationship, possible parenting, middle age, and then retirement and [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Eating Disorders</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/eating-disorders/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/eating-disorders/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Jul 2019 23:02:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ADDICTIONS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BODY IMAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[DEPRESSION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Recovery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WEIGHT MANAGEMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anorexia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[appetite]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[binge eating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bulimia]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional eating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[food]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[healthy eating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[over eating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[purging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[starvation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weight loss]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4317</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[An Eating Disorder Is a Very Serious Problem That Demands Immediate Attention The Chinese used to bind the feet of women to make them smaller. So tiny and fragile were their feet, in fact, that some women were left essentially crippled, barely able to walk. To the Chinese, this was a sign of beauty and social status. But to us it seems a cruel and bizarre practice. The irony is that we in present-day American society do something just as cruel, just as bizarre as the Chinese did. We tend to see the thin, emaciated, malnourished female as beautiful. If your body has &#8220;the look,&#8221; you are seen as healthier, younger, better able to wear the right clothes, and you will gain social approval more readily. This definition of beauty is linked to our society’s emphasis on youth – younger women tend to be thinner than those who are older. In contemporary America, thin women are hired for jobs more frequently than heavier women, and they are married sooner &#8230; to wealthier men. Many of us hate the bodies we were born with and will agree to any number of procedures to change the shape of our bodies, including starvation diets and surgeries which suck the fat out of certain areas of our bodies (and then we go on to plump up our lips!). Is the Chinese practice of binding feet any more bizarre than what we do? (Whatever happened to the notion that good exercise, healthy nutrition, and genuine liking of ourselves and our bodies, whatever their shape, might be the best way to live?) In truth, our preoccupation with extreme thinness is just a passing social fad. A century ago in America the plump look was in. And, hopefully, our preoccupation with thinness may continue to change over the years. Some models these days are older and a bit heavier than they were in years past. And there is a trend in the fashion world to emphasize the healthy body and healthy living rather than placing a premium on the emaciated look. Unfortunately, the value placed on the [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Distortions in Your Body Image</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/distortions-in-your-body-image/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/distortions-in-your-body-image/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 26 Jun 2019 00:08:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BODY IMAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[DEPRESSION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[body image]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[depression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diet]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dieting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional eating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weight loss]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4311</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[“What disturbs people’s minds is not events, but their judgments on events.” – Epictetus In China, parents once bound the feet of their daughters in pursuit of beauty. In parts of Africa, both men and women elongate their earlobes and decorate their skin with minerals to look attractive, and this trend may be found in the United States now. At one time in this society, we found plump, rotund people to be the epitome of beauty. Old movies show us that the Tarzans and Supermen of past decades would hardly pass muster in today’s gyms. Today we define beauty as a thin, youthful, and muscular look. Today we go under the knife and on extreme diets to achieve a socially acceptable appearance – not to mention tattoos and body piercing – all practices that are similar to the early Chinese custom of binding feet. Although changes are taking place, strong social standards have dictated, especially through the media, how we should look – and if our own bodies deviate from these expectations, which is the case for almost all of us, we can feel inferior and ashamed. We hide. We cover up. We don’t like an important part of our selves. We feel depressed. We feel anxious in front of other people. We feel powerless – and we are apologetic when we show the world who we are. Body image refers to your personal relationship with your body. This includes all of the beliefs, attitudes, thoughts, feelings, and perceptions you have about your body. It does not refer to what your body actually looks like. Our body is one of many aspects of who we are, but for many of us it is the dominating source of our sense of self. If we compare ourselves to what we are supposed to look like, we come up short and this brings up negative feelings about who we are. We forget that our inner or essential self has many wonderful attributes. We do not have to harbor negative feelings about ourselves because our external appearance may not conform to current social norms. [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Losing Your Relationship  &#8211; Aftermath of Divorce</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/losing-your-relationship-understanding-the-after-effects/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/losing-your-relationship-understanding-the-after-effects/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Jan 2019 02:31:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Divorce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[GRIEF & LOSS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anger]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[divorce]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[friends]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[grief and loss]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marraige counseling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4239</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Most divorcing people are forced to come to terms with a number of fears. What will people say? Who can I trust to talk to? How can I handle my partner&#8217;s anger toward me? How do I deal with my own anger? Am I a complete failure? How can I be a single parent? Will I be able to keep my children? What about money? Can I do the banking and buy groceries and pay bills and fix the car? Can I handle my loneliness? Am I completely unlovable? Will I ever love anyone else again? Do I have the energy for this much change? When we hold on to our fears and refuse to do anything about them, we increase the likelihood that these will be the very areas where we experience trouble. Loneliness The loneliness one experiences at the time of divorce can feel immeasurable. The finality of the marriage, the uncertainty about the future, and the knowledge that your partner will no longer be there to comfort you or to spend time with you, can all contribute to an empty feeling that will not go away. The clue is to change loneliness to aloneness, to change the emptiness to a feeling of peace, contentment, and fulfillment. Looking into oneself and liking what one sees is a key to making the shift to aloneness. (Get into being alone. It is a precious but tenuous gift that can disappear far too quickly from one&#8217;s life.) Friendship Divorce is a true test of just who your real friends are. It is important to draw on the emotional support of friends during a divorce. Unfortunately, many of your friends were those who knew you as a couple and they often must choose between you. Even those who try to stay neutral find it difficult. Many may feel that your divorce somehow threatens their own marriages and some friends may now find it difficult to relate to you as a single person. Not only that, but you may find it difficult to trust others during a divorce. Getting out, feeling free, and [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>When Your Teen Tells You They’re Gay: Tips on Responding</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/when-your-teen-tells-you-theyre-gay-tips-on-responding/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/when-your-teen-tells-you-theyre-gay-tips-on-responding/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2018 01:50:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUPLES THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[LGBTQ]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting a gay teen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[your teen's coming out]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4163</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For many LGBTQ youths, the act of “coming out” to their parents that they are gay is nerve-racking. They may have already told some friends, but coming out to you, their parents, is a whole other matter. Worries about being accepted or loved by you afterwards will probably be on their minds. They may be nervous, anxious, even scared to tell you something that they have kept hidden—perhaps for years. You may very well have a wide range of emotions during these discussions. For obvious reasons, this won’t be an easy conversation for either of you. How you respond to your teen’s revelation is critical. Here are several tips to help you respond sensibly. Listen One of the key things that you can do as a parent is to listen to your teen. This means really listening, as this may well be one of the most important conversations that you will ever have together. Keep in mind that most likely your teen has been working up the courage to have this conversation with you for a while. Give them the space to be heard and get everything off their chest. Some ideas for how to do this include: If you can’t talk when they approach you, negotiate and commit to another time. Remember what you need when you want to be heard. You teen now needs this from you. Stay focused on your teen. Stop what you’re doing; eliminate distractions such as cell phones or the TV. Move to someplace quiet where you won’t be interrupted. Refrain from jumping in or interrupting. Ask them to repeat anything that you don’t understand. As they talk, remember to breathe. Respond Appropriately Your respect for your teen will be vital. If you already suspected or have known that your teen is gay, don’t stop the conversation because of this. Act as if you don’t know. If your teen’s request to talk with you comes as a surprise, it’s important that you don’t overreact. Respond in your normal tone of voice and stay in control of your emotions. If you struggle with what they [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Yes, Sexual Betrayal Can Lead to These PTSD Symptoms!</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/yes-sexual-betrayal-can-lead-to-these-ptsd-symptoms/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/yes-sexual-betrayal-can-lead-to-these-ptsd-symptoms/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 11 Jun 2018 19:30:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUPLES THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[GRIEF & LOSS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[INFIDELITY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE COUNSELING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infidelity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[PTSD]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sexual betrayal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sexual trauma]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[trust]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4111</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#160; Love is war. So the saying goes goes . That comparison may actually be fitting in connection with something you perhaps haven’t thought of—trauma. It’s no secret that sexual infidelity can be physically harmful and emotionally crushing. A betrayed partner may feel a whole range of devastating emotions and experiences a bewildering variety of bodily symptoms. One moment they feel angry and irritated, the next as if living in a daze where nothing matters. They can’t sleep, they can’t eat. It’s as if they’ve gone crazy. It’s a reaction to the trauma of betrayal. And it’s a very natural response when one feels unsafe and insecure in a relationship. In fact, studies have shown that those who have been sexually betrayed by their partner can suffer such devastating emotional turmoil that they display trauma symptoms very similar to those of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Why? Because the magnitude of a sexual betrayal can be enormous. Like an earthquake, this form of cheating shakes the very foundations of trust within a relationship. The PTSD Symptoms of Sexual Betrayal Consider some of the aftershocks of that blow. 1. Irritability, Rage, and Despair The initial anger and rage over the betrayal often give way to frequent and extreme mood swings. From rapid shifts between rage, hurt, sadness, and hopefulness to excessive emotional outbursts and breaking down in tears. The reactions are usually this intense because it wasn’t just anyone that hurt the victim. They have been betrayed by the person they thought they could count on the most. It’s no wonder that being traumatized in this way causes an enormous range of pain. 2. Avoidance, Feelings of Emptiness, and Emotional Numbness Emotional numbness often follows rage, irritability, and despair. Everything feels hollow and unappealing. Things the victim formerly enjoyed don’t bring them pleasure anymore. Feeling empty and yet feeling a flood emotions, they’ll avoid any reminders of the betrayal, trying to forget the terrible pain. And eventually, they may even withdraw from friends and family, isolating themselves to hide from the emotional upheaval that they can’t control. 3. Flashbacks, Nightmares, and Painful [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Breaking Free of Loneliness</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/breaking-free-of-loneliness/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/breaking-free-of-loneliness/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 01 May 2018 23:49:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMITMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[aging]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[feeling alone]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[isolated]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[lonely]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rejection]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[social isolation]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4023</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#160; Only the lonely Know the way I feel tonight Only the lonely Know this feeling ain’t right – Roy Orbison If you feel lonely, you’re not alone. Loneliness is a subjective sense of isolation – a feeling of not being able to connect with other people, a sense of being apart. As humans, we feel the need to be with other people. We need to relate to others, to get involved in their lives, to work with them, and to express our emotions around other people. Our social needs are nearly as powerful as our other basic needs, like our needs for food, water, and shelter. When we are deprived of our social needs, we can become fearful. Our sense of being alone might become amplified. It is common for a person in social isolation to magnify the thoughts that accompany loneliness – and then withdraw even further from others. When we choose to withdraw, we may end up feeling trapped in our isolation. Given the importance of social connection, it is surprising that twenty percent of people feel sufficiently isolated that loneliness plays a major role in their lives. Over the past several decades our culture has changed to the point where loneliness has emerged as a major social and psychological problem. We are a culture that places a premium on individualism. We emphasize the importance of being able to do things on our own. Many people pride themselves on their ability to survive and experience success without having to depend on other people. The down side of this social norm, however, is that many of us feel lonely. We do need other people. Research findings confirm that as a society we are moving toward more loneliness. Respondents to a social science survey in 2004 were three times more likely to report that they had nobody with whom to discuss important issues than respondents in 1985. During the past twenty years the size of the average household has declined ten percent to 2.5 persons. In 1990, more than one in five households was headed by a single parent [&#8230;]]]></description>
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