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	<title>Better Relationships &#187; SEX</title>
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	<link>https://www.better-relationships.com</link>
	<description>Marriage &#38; Couples Counseling, Psychotherapy, Premarital Counseling</description>
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		<title>Distortions in Your Body Image</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/distortions-in-your-body-image/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/distortions-in-your-body-image/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 26 Jun 2019 00:08:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Anxiety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BODY IMAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[DEPRESSION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[body image]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[depression]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[diet]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dieting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional eating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[loneliness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self care]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[weight loss]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4311</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[“What disturbs people’s minds is not events, but their judgments on events.” – Epictetus In China, parents once bound the feet of their daughters in pursuit of beauty. In parts of Africa, both men and women elongate their earlobes and decorate their skin with minerals to look attractive, and this trend may be found in the United States now. At one time in this society, we found plump, rotund people to be the epitome of beauty. Old movies show us that the Tarzans and Supermen of past decades would hardly pass muster in today’s gyms. Today we define beauty as a thin, youthful, and muscular look. Today we go under the knife and on extreme diets to achieve a socially acceptable appearance – not to mention tattoos and body piercing – all practices that are similar to the early Chinese custom of binding feet. Although changes are taking place, strong social standards have dictated, especially through the media, how we should look – and if our own bodies deviate from these expectations, which is the case for almost all of us, we can feel inferior and ashamed. We hide. We cover up. We don’t like an important part of our selves. We feel depressed. We feel anxious in front of other people. We feel powerless – and we are apologetic when we show the world who we are. Body image refers to your personal relationship with your body. This includes all of the beliefs, attitudes, thoughts, feelings, and perceptions you have about your body. It does not refer to what your body actually looks like. Our body is one of many aspects of who we are, but for many of us it is the dominating source of our sense of self. If we compare ourselves to what we are supposed to look like, we come up short and this brings up negative feelings about who we are. We forget that our inner or essential self has many wonderful attributes. We do not have to harbor negative feelings about ourselves because our external appearance may not conform to current social norms. [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>No Secrets &#8230; Telling the Truth in Our Relationships</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/no-secrets-telling-the-truth-in-our-relationships/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/no-secrets-telling-the-truth-in-our-relationships/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 24 Apr 2019 22:40:26 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARGUMENTS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMITMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUPLES THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[FORGIVENESS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[falling in love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[finding happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[forgiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[trust in relationships]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4299</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#160; When we commit ourselves to a relationship with another person, we rightly expect to experience a sense of fulfillment that we didn’t have before. Humans, as social beings, seem to have a universal desire to find a partner. Sexual attraction often serves as the motivator for making initial contact with the other person, and this is usually replaced over time with a deeper sense of commitment and intimacy. It comes as a terrible disappointment to some people when the sexual phase of their relationship fails to lead in time to something deeper. The task, then, is to understand the forces which block the development of a deeper sense of intimacy – and to do something about it. Fortunately, with some work – and it’s often hard work – couples can learn to move into the stage of deeper sharing and more fulfillment in their relationships. From Excitement to Reality The excitement which comes with entering a new relationship touches us at the core of our being. It influences our thinking, our emotions, and our physical bodies. In some sense it feels like a dream come true. We feel that, finally, the hard years of experiencing the world alone have come to an end. The thing that we have longed for has been achieved. We now have a partner, someone who can share, understand, and appreciate our most private experiences. The world suddenly seems like a happier and more secure place. The beginning stages of a relationship can bring a precious sense of connection – but when that phone call doesn’t come, when a plan goes awry, when the wrong words are spoken, the emotional high can turn swiftly into a feeling of devastation. Being in love can have its down side. Over time the physical stage of the relationship is typically replaced by a period of getting to know more about other aspects of our partner’s personality. Some of these characteristics are endearing to us – and others irritate us. We learn how our partner attends to the demands of everyday life, and we learn that he or she [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Dealing with Controlling People</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/dealing-with-controlling-people/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/dealing-with-controlling-people/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 13 Feb 2019 01:06:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARGUMENTS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[contolling people]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[control]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[integrity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[low self esteem]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[manipulation]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self-doubt]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4247</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[“If I Win, You Lose” is Not Our Only Option! Control, like most facets of human behavior, is probably best experienced in moderation. At one end of the spectrum, control is a positive, adaptive tool. For example, control over prolonged and constant chaos in our lives is usually a good thing. At the other end, control can be seen as negative. People who are over-controlled to the point of being unable to feel or express emotion can find life’s expected turmoils to be difficult or even impossible to handle. While some control is appropriate, especially when the control is used as a way of adapting to some aspect of our own lives, it can spread out to other people when it’s taken to the extreme &#8230; and sometimes we don’t realize that we end up controlling other people. We sometimes walk a thin line in this regard. Controlling others has the potential to be a highly negative experience, not only for the one controlled, but also for the controller. The Controlling Person&#8217;s Motivation On the surface, we might think of a controlling person as one who is strong, independent, and even a natural born leader. But this is seldom the case. Ask yourself, why would a person need to dominate the actions and feelings of another person? It could be because the controlling person may privately experience a great deal of self-doubt, negativity, and lack of fulfillment. Controllers may be people who lack the tools to achieve personal integrity through their own resources &#8230; but they get a feeling of fulfillment when they can control the behavior of another person. With this thought in mind, we can see the controlling person as one who may be the weak and dependent party in an interaction. And it may be the one who is controlled who actually has more strength – that is, it takes strength to give in to the needs of another person (the controller). Control and Conflict in Relationships We can draw on the strength and energy of another person when we may feel unable to provide for our [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>When Your Teen Tells You They’re Gay: Tips on Responding</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/when-your-teen-tells-you-theyre-gay-tips-on-responding/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/when-your-teen-tells-you-theyre-gay-tips-on-responding/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 Aug 2018 01:50:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUPLES THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[LGBTQ]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting a gay teen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[your teen's coming out]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4163</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For many LGBTQ youths, the act of “coming out” to their parents that they are gay is nerve-racking. They may have already told some friends, but coming out to you, their parents, is a whole other matter. Worries about being accepted or loved by you afterwards will probably be on their minds. They may be nervous, anxious, even scared to tell you something that they have kept hidden—perhaps for years. You may very well have a wide range of emotions during these discussions. For obvious reasons, this won’t be an easy conversation for either of you. How you respond to your teen’s revelation is critical. Here are several tips to help you respond sensibly. Listen One of the key things that you can do as a parent is to listen to your teen. This means really listening, as this may well be one of the most important conversations that you will ever have together. Keep in mind that most likely your teen has been working up the courage to have this conversation with you for a while. Give them the space to be heard and get everything off their chest. Some ideas for how to do this include: If you can’t talk when they approach you, negotiate and commit to another time. Remember what you need when you want to be heard. You teen now needs this from you. Stay focused on your teen. Stop what you’re doing; eliminate distractions such as cell phones or the TV. Move to someplace quiet where you won’t be interrupted. Refrain from jumping in or interrupting. Ask them to repeat anything that you don’t understand. As they talk, remember to breathe. Respond Appropriately Your respect for your teen will be vital. If you already suspected or have known that your teen is gay, don’t stop the conversation because of this. Act as if you don’t know. If your teen’s request to talk with you comes as a surprise, it’s important that you don’t overreact. Respond in your normal tone of voice and stay in control of your emotions. If you struggle with what they [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<title>(6) Ways to Increase Intimacy and Escape the &#8216;Roommate&#8217; Syndrome</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/6-ways-to-increase-intimacy-and-escape-the-roommate-syndrome/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/6-ways-to-increase-intimacy-and-escape-the-roommate-syndrome/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 17 Jul 2018 21:23:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMITMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[communication]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[finding happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[happiness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[relationships]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4148</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Have you felt like you and your partner are more like roommates than intimate companions? Watching Netflix in your sweatpants while your partner plays a game on their cell phone sounds like a hot date, right? Not exactly. There is not a lot about that scenario radiating romance. What it does portray is a mutual level of extreme comfort you and your partner have embraced. Of course, nothing is wrong with feeling comfortable around your partner. Actually, you want to be comfortable with each other. But you also want to nurture the intimate connection you have and acting like roommates simply doesn’t do that. If you feel stuck in the ‘roommate rut’, try these suggestions: 1. Get in the Right Frame of Mind The roommate rut starts in your mind. To dig your way out of the rut, you first have to change the way you think about your relationship. To begin, stop thinking you’ve “arrived” in your relationship. No relationship ever arrives. But it can grow and move in new and exciting directions. There are always more adventures to be had and plenty more chapters to be written. Adopt a mindset that forces you to think of your partner differently. For instance, explore and learn more about them on a deeper level – their dreams, personal goals and struggles, fantasies, and wishes. And really listen to what they say.  One way to make your partner feel like they matter to you is to occasionally repeat back what you heard them saying to make sure you understood them. 2. Connect When You&#8217;re Apart Keeping a relationship healthy includes maintaining the connection while things are good between you and when they&#8217;re not. So, make a point to reach out to your partner during the course of the day. Instead of text messaging, it&#8217;s better to call if you can. A ten second phone call and hearing the sound of each other’s voice is sometimes all that it takes for partners feel cared about, even they&#8217;re fighting. If they can&#8217;t answer leave a message that you were thinking of them. Either way, [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Do’s and Don’ts</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/talking-to-your-kids-about-sex-dos-and-donts/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/talking-to-your-kids-about-sex-dos-and-donts/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 14 May 2018 22:17:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[PARENTING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[children and sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kids and sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex education]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[teen sex]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4061</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#160; It’s the one conversation that makes parents cringe and squirm: the sex talk. It&#8217;s natural if you feel anxious about this and you can let your child know this if it happens. They too will probably feel awkward but if you keep calm and aren&#8217;t afraid of having this discussion, it will help them feel safer with you. If you are finding yourself in this position, considering these &#8216;Do’s and Don’ts&#8217; may help you handle the situation: Do Start the Conversation Early This means starting the discussion much earlier than you might imagine. So be prepared, learn what to say and agree with your partner on how to approach this sensitive topic. Parents who choose to do so have “The Talk” just before their child&#8217;s teen years. Yet, the conversation really needs to happen earlier than that, and not just once. Of course, you want to be age-appropriate, especially with young children. One good resource for knowing when to start and what to say is your child&#8217;s pediatrician. Also, several excellent books on this topic are available. Young people are usually way ahead of their parents when it comes to leaning about sex.  They&#8217;ve already seen or heard a lot of sexual references in TV shows, movies, social media and music. But without proper guidance, trying to make sense of this on their own can leave a child confused and anxious. So instead of waiting until your child starts believing what they see and hear from friends or on social media, consider starting these discussions more sooner than later. Don’t Overreact to Questions If your child starts asking questions about sex, don’t overreact. Instead, take a few deep breaths to get yourself centered and ready to talk. Thank them for coming to you and tell them you know how hard this might be for them. Their curiosity is normal, and taking the initiative to ask you indicates that they trust and feel safe you. But, if they see you getting upset or overreacting, they may blame themselves and learn not to ask you again. Their questions are an opportunity [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>An Emotional Affair – What It Is and What It Isn’t</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/an-emotional-affair-what-it-is-and-what-it-isnt/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/an-emotional-affair-what-it-is-and-what-it-isnt/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 18 Apr 2018 04:45:19 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMITMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUPLES THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[INFIDELITY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE COUNSELING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional affair]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infidelity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.better-relationships.com/?p=4007</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You may have heard the term “emotional affair.” Do you understand what it really means? Is it really &#8216;cheating&#8217;? Consider the following: What Is an Emotional Affair? An emotional affair can start off innocently but quickly develop into something more. How so? For instance, imagine that you are in a relationship. You feel satisfied with your partner and vice versa. Then someone new enters your life, or an existing relationship becomes more meaningful to you. For example, you begin to confide in a co-worker about your personal life; about your thoughts and feelings about your life. Soon you begin to look forward to seeing them at the office. You realize that you “click” with this person. You feel open and vulnerable, connected to them in a way that you haven’t felt before, or lately. But instead of talking about these things with your partner, you talk about it with this new person. Even worse, you don’t tell your partner what’s going on. You’ve slowly slipped into an emotional affair. How Is Talking Considered an Affair? Talking with another friend or co-worker is obviously not an emotional affair. It is the level of intimacy involved with the conversation along with the emotions that can make it so. After all, you could easily talk to a friend about a personal topic without having this type of emotional reaction. In fact, you most likely would have already had the same discussion with your partner. But once you begin to have an emotional reaction, like looking forward to seeing the other person, you are no longer simply having a private conversation. Once your feelings are involved, your conversations take on a degree intimacy. And if the other person begins to feel and behave as you do, an emotional bond has formed. When this bond comes into conflict with the bond you’re supposed to have your partner and you keep it a secret, you are having an emotional affair. But I Thought Affairs Were Strictly Sexual! Yes, it’s true that many affairs are sexually-based. However, remember that many who participate in an emotional affair do so [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>When Partners’ Sex Drives Differ – 7 Coping Tips</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/when-partners-sex-drives-differ-7-coping-tips/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/when-partners-sex-drives-differ-7-coping-tips/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 10 Apr 2018 00:12:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[ARGUMENTS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUNSELING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[INFIDELITY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE COUNSELING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIP THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[different sex drives]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[making love]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex drive]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.better-relationships.com/?p=3997</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sex and sexual desire is a key part of many relationships. It provides a certain aspect of intimacy. So, what happens when your partner’s sex drive differs from yours? First, this doesn&#8217;t have to be an obstacle. Consider these tips to help you cope with this difference and still maintaining a healthy relationship. Tip #1: Communicate Expectations to Your Partner Communication is important for so many facets of a relationship. This includes intimacy. Have honest conversations with each other about your expectations in the bedroom. And don’t just make it a one-time discussion. Revisit the issue frequently to make sure you both remain on the same page. Hopefully, you had some of these discussions when you first started seeing each other. However, expectations can change over time. So it’s important to maintain an open dialogue. Tip #2: Listen to Each Other’s Perspectives Another important tip is to actively listen to each other. Keep an open mind and hold back from making prejudgments. For instance, if you want to have more sex than your partner does, listen to their point of view. (You can make sure you heard them correctly by repeating back what you heard.) As with many aspects of a relationship, when couples actively listen, they have a better understanding of each other. This means that they can still respect one another while holding different points of view. Tip #3: Refocus on the Relationship Although what happens in the bedroom is important, it’s not all that’s important in a relationship. If the relationship isn’t healthy, then your sexual experience won’t be healthy either. As mentioned above, you can start by communicating and listening. However, it may be necessary to get help with this from a professional therapist. A therapist can advise you on all aspects of the relationship, including intimacy. Tip #4: Don’t Nag or Guilt-Trip Your Partner If you are the one who wants to have more sex, don’t nag or guilt-trip your partner. Trying to convince your partner to have sex just isn’t sexy. It should be something that both of you enjoy equally together. Otherwise, when [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<item>
		<title>Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater? Myths and Facts</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/once-a-cheater-always-a-cheater-myths-and-facts/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/once-a-cheater-always-a-cheater-myths-and-facts/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 03 Apr 2018 22:31:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMITMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUNSELING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUPLES THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[FORGIVENESS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[INFIDELITY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE COUNSELING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[WOMEN'S ISSUES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheater]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cheating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[emotional affair]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[forgiveness]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infidelitiy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[online affair]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[unfaithful]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.better-relationships.com/?p=3990</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Clearly, whenever you’ve been cheated on, there are many feelings that arise. However, some of these emotions could be based on myths about those who cheat. And that can cause you to make decisions based on faulty information. If you are trying to cope with a partner’s infidelity, get the facts and reject the myths. Myth: “My partner cheated, which means they don’t love me anymore.” FACT: In reality, many people who cheat report that they did not cheat just because the relationship was bad. It is completely possible that despite your partner&#8217;s infidelity, they still feel very strongly toward you. In fact, their reasoning behind the affair may have had nothing to do with how they feel about you and much more about how they feel about themselves. Myth: “People who cheat once will cheat again.” FACT: That kind of thinking only sets up your partner to fail again. Yes, they made a mistake. But that doesn’t mean they are doomed to make it again. Everyone has the capacity to make decisions that affect their future. Your partner made a poor decision for your relationship by cheating. However, what they do afterward can mean a lot. You can see their attitude, for example, if: Your partner takes responsibility for their behavior and thee pain it&#8217;s caused. They sincerely apologize and asks for forgiveness. They have permanently cut all ties to the other person. Your partner wants to participate in therapy with you. They make an earnest and sincere effort to repair your relationship. Myth: “If I stay, our relationship will always be defined by the affair.” FACT: Certainly, the affair will have an immediate impact on the relationship. A major factor is trust. With any affair, the wounded partner will feel a loss of trust to the other. Yet, the cheating does not have to define the relationship in the long-term. If both of you want to make things right it will take a lot of work and commitment to change. For your partner, this means putting in a sincere effort to rebuild the lost trust. Of course, this [&#8230;]]]></description>
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		<title>The Positive Impact of Premarital Counseling – 7 Ways Your Relationship Can Benefit</title>
		<link>https://www.better-relationships.com/the-positive-impact-of-premarital-counseling-7-ways-your-relationship-can-benefit/</link>
		<comments>https://www.better-relationships.com/the-positive-impact-of-premarital-counseling-7-ways-your-relationship-can-benefit/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 13 Mar 2018 01:38:15 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Jim Swaniger]]></dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[COMMITMENT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COMMUNICATION]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[CONFLICT]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[COUPLES THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[FINANCES]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[MARRIAGE COUNSELING]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIP THERAPY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RELATIONSHIPS]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SEX]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[counseling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[couples counseling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[marriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[money]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[premarital counseling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[wedding plans]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.better-relationships.com/?p=3957</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Many couples consider premarital counseling as something for those who really don’t know what they want out of a marriage. Yet, that is far from the truth. In reality, premarital counseling should be a prerequisite for any couple looking to get married. How can it benefit and strengthen your relationship? #1: Refining Communication Skills Knowing how to communicate effectively is a never-ending challenge in most aspects of life. Even for people who are already experienced communicators, marriage poses its unique communication challenges. Some potential problem areas include: Listening Skills: While your partner can repeat what you just said, you still don’t feel that they heard you. Can you openly discuss your ideas, thoughts and feelings without being criticized? Do you have effective conflict resolution skills? Do you keep fighting about the same thing? Do you fight fair? What topics do you agree on and what do you fight about? Do you expect your partner to know what you’re thinking or feeling? (aka ‘mind-reading’) #2: Aligning Your Outlooks on Life Premarital counseling helps partners determine if their overall goals and outlooks on marriage are, in general, compatible and if not, is change feasible? Things to consider include: Lifestyle differences: Talk together about this example: One partner is energetic, socially active and fantasizes about running for public office. The other partner is more introverted and prefers a much quieter lifestyle. Could this couple be happy together? Are you both willing to accommodate the other’s points of view? What will happen if she or he cannot change? Who has more influence now and does this need to change after marriage? How are decisions made? Do you enjoy some of the same activities? If not, are you willing to try to participate in what your partner enjoys? Are both of you content with the amount of time you have to relax? Are you free to spend some time apart and enjoy your own friends and hobbies? Is your partner responsible for your happiness, and if so, how will he or she do that? The dating process helps with sorting out some of these issues. [&#8230;]]]></description>
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